Davy's Lexicon

Chocolate Easter Bunny Music
Music that is pretty on the outside, and nothing but air inside.

Closely related to Chocolate Easter Bunny Music: "Orchestrated Like A Motherfucker, But It's Crap."

A corollary to olambic: "NOT Orchestrated Like A Motherfucker, AND It's Crap."

Another corollary to olambic: "Produced Like A Motherfucker, But It's Dumb As Toast."

Look At My Orchestration.

(typical on YouTube comment threads and social networks) Yet Another Heart Versus Brain In Music Thread.

Lenny's Revenge
Contemporary concert music that sounds like warmed-over Bernstein, especially ze mambo from ze Vest Side Story.

Responding to an e-mail by barfing back the entire e-mail text and responding line by line.

Something icky enough to make you barf, e.g., Republicans in charge.

Responding to your e-mail and leaving your original e-mail isolated at the bottom.

To Gingrich
1. To criticize vociferously while at the same time having no idea, talent, or intention to improve that which is being criticized. EXAMPLE: "I've Gingriched your counterpoint homework." 2. To fail so spectacularly that you drag down with you everyone in the vicinity. 3. To perfect the art of the personal attack and then be shocked, SHOCKED when it happens to you.

Writing or responding to a letter by using form or pre-fab sentences and paragraphs. EXAMPLE: "I wrote them a detailed letter of complaint and they boilerplated me back."

Dogma Breath
A person with an overdeveloped sense of Manifesto Destiny.

Style trait
A particular way a composer solves a compositional problem in many pieces, e.g., moving the bass a half step at articulative points.

A particular way a composer solves a compositional problem in many pieces, e.g., moving the bass a half step at articulative points.

Yogi Berra's analysis of 'Tristan und Isolde'
Ninety percent of this opera is half-diminished.

Up Shit's Creek. Synonym to UTRWAP.

Obsessively comparing your work to that of Ravel.

Gigaposting (Nanoposting)
Posting repeatedly and/or excessively on a social network, often redundantly, and nearly always identically on several social networks. Sometimes called gazillioposting

It's Not About You.

Speaking with intense glottal pressure, such as in the manner of Louis Armstrong or the Cookie Monster, except moreso. Named for Bob Malooga Looga Looga Looga Looga.

Single-line music given an orchestrational crescendo. Example: the opening of "It's the Same Old Song".

Credit to Corinne Pearlman. "I burped, and sick came in my mouth." Sequel: IFASCOMB.

Credit to Mindy Wagner. "Gorgeous, Although I Could Have Easily Done It Myself."

Pop-up tutti
Unisons or octaves that "pop up" out of a busy texture, such as in several of Davy's pieces. Examplage Examplage Examplage Examplage

Shorthand for "What a Fucking Asshole." Typically appropriate for administrators.

The Davy Warble
Common accompanimental figure in Davy's large pieces: a 2-note alternating figure in 2 or 3 parts, in compound meter. First identified by Stacy Garrop. Examplage Examplage Examplage

To criticize out of willful ignorance.

Metaphor Of Incredible Lameness.

The longest sentence I know that uses only two-letter words
So -- to be me, do we do it as it is, do we do it as it is to be, do we do it as if it is to be, or do we do it to me as if it is to be me?

Surefire conversation stoppers

Well, in a way, aren't we all?
Well, why would you?
Well, why wouldn't you?
A good time was had by me.
Well, in this day and age, who isn't?
That's what you said next week.
Really? Well, in that case, blah blah blah!
Yeah, but that's what they told Mozart.
How about now?
Well, there's 20 minutes of my life I'll never get back.
Your head looks funny in this light.
That was Zen. This is now.
How is that not a non sequitur?
I think the air just got let out of this room.
The end
Now I REALLY have to go to the bathroom.
Compared to what?
Excellent. So my nefarious plan is working.
The critic isn't going to notice.
Well, for YOU.
Yeah, just like in real life.
I've come to make fun of your head.
Don't break your arm patting yourself on the back.
Oh, if I had a nickel for every time someone said THAT to me...
I like to say "poop."
"Poop" spelled upside down is "dood."
"Otto" spelled inside out is "toot."
That's a very Then thing to thay.
But am I bitter? Lick me and find out.

Palindromes that never caught on

I burp a prubi.
Tons o' snot.
Making art -- is it rag nikam?
Stop pots.
"Stress a diva!" David asserts.
Stun Soho's nuts.
Time fools a sloof. Emit.
Flog a dog, o da golf!
Et tur, Brutte?
Snot! Oh Pedro, horde photons!
Evita, Vi: Red Sox answer brews. Naxos derivative!
People have eva help, o ep!
Me? Fun? Hey! Yeh! Nufem!
Ho hu! Uh oh.
Elk City Tickle.
Sparky's y-kraps.
War teb a drag, gard a bet raw.
Sumatra: art am us?
Moody: my doom.
Bach, tab a bath cab.
Maps fo' nit? A tin of spam!
Looks like a bitee tiba ekil skool.
Stan made edam nats. (VARIATION: Stan got to gnats)
Tons 'n' tons o' snot 'n' snot.
Stunned was I ere I saw dennuts.
Loopy, poopy pool.
Stop DNA! (and pots)
Madam, I'm a big fan of onaf giba ami madam.
Strange begnarts.
Ebola, not on a lobe.
Poopy? Oy, poop.
Emit repaper time.
You can not make kam ton. Na. Cu. Oy!
Oops. Dennis, in Ned's poo.
Tons 'n' tons 'n' tons o' snot 'n' snot 'n' snot.
Tons, tons, tons o' snot. Tons o' snot's not snot. (the MARTLER variation.)

Lines from movies usable in everyday conversation (at least by me)

"A shining star in the cinema firm-a-ment."
...with fire and MYOOsic.
A whole weekend, that's what it looks like to me.
And I shall be Queen.
And then we wrote....
Anybody want a peanut?
Are you a good witch? Or a bad witch?
As you wish.
Bounce banana!
But mostly Bob tired of wearing clothes that fit perfectly on Xerox machine.
By leaps every minute, he's top of the poll.
Can I help it if I have this enormous stride? I mean, look at it!
Character is what you are in the dark.
Dahn't be styoopid.
Dark is not one of my favorite colors.
Did you call me a camoola?
Dignity. Always dignity.
Don' know!
Do you always begin conversations this way?
Drop. Your. Sword.
Good ... bad ... I'm the one with the gun.
Have fun stormin' the castle!
Hello, lady.
He's only MOSTLY dead.
I hate excess verbiage.
I know he can GET the job. But can he DO the job?
I like to watch.
I practice a lot when I'm alone.
I thought it was a costume ball.
I thought of it SO very quickly.
I would not say such things if I were you.
If you get tired, pull over. If you get hungry, eat something.
If you haven't got your health, you haven't got anything.
I'll never get another chance like this again. Never, never, never, never, never.
I'm tryin' to think, but nuttin' happens.
Input. Need input.
Is that my voice? Is that MY voice?
It's filed under J, for "toys."
It's great to be the King.
It's in D minor, the saddest of keys.
It's possible. Pig.
Klatu Verata Nicto!
Malooga Looga Looga Looga Looga. One malooga, four loogas.
My brain? That's my second favorite organ!
My personal favorite, soon to be one of yours.
My way's not very sportsmanlike.
No matter where you go, there you are.
Not to fifty!
No way out... No way out ... No way out ... No way out ...
No, YOU must be Don Francisco's sister.
Oh dear. I'm afraid that's the worst thing I've ever heard.
Of course we talk. Don't everybody?
Pakula camoola.
Put it this way: Plato? Aristotle? Socrates? Morons.
Really? Like what?
Shop smart. Shop S Mart.
Some would say business IS pleasure.
That ... was so .... proFESSional.
The cell structure has been checked.
The Great Amer-kian novel!
Then we are at an impasse.
There's a fine line between clever and stupid.
This .... is .... my BOOMSTICK!
Three little words: you are a dope.
Time to start suffering and write that symphony.
Time to stop suffering and write that symphony.
To the pain.
Truly you have a dizzying intellect
Two faces.
Welcome to the garbagerie.
Well, I certainly hope you'll die soon.
Well, we can SAY it. I don't know what it means, but we can say it.
What about the R.O.U.S.'s?
What would you do with a brain if you had one?
Who knows? They only speak German.
When everybody has superpowers .... NOBODY has superpowers!
(corollaries) When everything is dissonant (syncopated) ... NOTHING is dissonant (syncopated)!
WHOOP tee doo dee doodle.
Why, I thought to myself, not?
Would you like a plastic of wine?
You're a major loon -- you know that.
You have to. You've got a five-year contract.
So, like, if you're nice to them they get you stuff?
You miserable vomitous mass.
You mock my pain. I died that day.

Punch lines in search of jokes

But mom, I said there were TWO of them.
Then he "waddled" back to where he came from.
That was Zen. This is Mao.
La cucina? Si, veramente la cucina!
Yes, but not for you.
It's back outside, with the help of a plunger and a dustbin.
"I glove the day you prove."
Two treads are better than one!
This is not the year of the dog, it's the year of the monkey.
"That's not a bug -- it's a feature."
Bling bling to me only with thine ice!
It said, "some assembly required," but this is not what I was expecting.
Sacks of one, half a lozenge of the other.
Sliver me timbers!
Who let the frogs out?
No, she's Glanda. The morally ambivalent witch of the northnortheast.
When you find out, let me know. Again.
That's the second time you've said "trout" today.
It's everywhere YOU are.
Once! Twice! THREE times a deity!
That's what happens when you put your money where your mouth is.
That's why they call it a corpuscle.
Ah, but in Version 2.1 you have to use the Pointer tool for that!
It's exactly what Partch would have done. Except without the microtones.
That's what happens when the starter's pistol gets stuck in your nose.
Mosquitoes? I thought you said Burritos!
I'm afraid my aim isn't that precise.
Link to me only with thine thighs.
When I said we were on a tight budget, I wasn't talking about Danskins.
No, YOU go.
I'm sure the hamster would beg to differ.
True, but not if you count backwards.
Hence the term ... long shot.
I'll have to sharpen it later, then.
Because we have special powers. Like Fred Farkle!
It wasn't Marmite -- it was Cronkite.
So the ferrets stopped asking about breakfast.